Are you “Giving” Your Health Away? Five Tips to Get it Back!

May 7, 2015

Being a mom is one of the most rewarding jobs of all – but it also requires a lot of giving and sacrificing, which can mean that mom frequently ends up at the bottom of her own priority list. Overtime, this can end up taking a toll on her health.  And although this situation is common with moms, it can really happen to anyone, especially if you are a:

people pleaser, doer, giver, over-achiever, go-to person, or superwoman (or man).

We know ‘em and love ‘em.  Doers are the ones that we can count on to just get stuff done. They just “show up,” and do the work. Important members on any committee, they are the top performers in a sales department, and often are very compassionate people who enjoy contributing and making a difference in the lives of others. This is all great!  But just remember:

“If your compassion does not include yourself, it is incomplete.”  – Jack Kornfield. Author of The Wise Heart

You see, the more you do and give, the less energy you have left over to take care of yourself.  Overtime, this can cause your health to slide.  This is one of the most common reasons that people come to work with me actually!  Because allowing work, life, school, extracurricular, and family commitments to push our health off the list of priorities can eventually show up years later as – weight gain, lowered immunity, an aching back, mood imbalances, digestion issues, adrenal fatigue, headaches, and even an increased disease risk.

Some Signs You Could be “Giving” Your Health Away:

  • Do you find yourself saying “yes” to things that you wish you hadn’t?
  • Do you end up with projects that seem to take over your life and require you to stay late and work weekends?
  • Do you (or others) have unrealistic expectations of yourself?
  • Do you feel guilty when you take time to do what you like to do, or when you (try to) relax?
  • Do you find that you have no time to exercise or eat healthy meals?
  • Have you been suffering from too much stress and a lack of sleep?
  • Are you feeling resentful of your work or other people in your life?
  • Are you finding that you just don’t have the energy or joy that you are used to?
  • Have you fallen sick more than usual lately? Or maybe even you are dealing with a serious health issue.
  • Are you suffering from digestion issues?
  • Do you go to work when you are sick?
  • Are you struggling to keep up with all your responsibilities?
  • Have you noticed that you have gained weight, which seems stuck right in your midsection?

Five Tips to Get Your Health Back on Track:

  1. MAKE time & plan for health. Let’s be honest – it’s not that we don’t have time for our workouts or healthy cooking – the truth is, we are not making time for it. I can fall prey to this one too if I do not schedule it and plan ahead.   Before I know it, the day has gotten away and I haven’t gotten in a workout, walk, or yoga class. When I put it into my calendar – and make it a priority – then it happens.  The cool thing about exercise – is a little bit here and there really adds up. Studies show that just 10-15 of minutes a day can benefit the metabolism. In fact – you are better off not doing cardio for 2 hours – because that can raise your stress hormone cortisol- which can backfire and lead to weight gain! For those days that are just too busy to even find 10 mins to workout – just park farther away, take the stairs instead of the elevator, or stand up and pace around the room next time you are on a conference call.  I find that planning ahead is also important for eating healthy meals.  If I don’t plan, that is when all of a sudden it is 6:00 and the kids are tapping my shoulder asking what is for dinner. When I plan ahead and decide what to cook for the week, make sure to get to the store and do some prep ahead of time – I notice that I am actually looking forward to cooking, and not dreading it.  There still will be those days when I don’t have the time (or energy, ingredients, inspiration) to cook – so we have a number of healthy go-to restaurants that don’t break the bank that are our go-tos for easy weeknight meals.
  2. INVEST in our health.  A common complaint about eating healthy that I hear is that it is too expensive. Again, it comes down to our priorities – we have no problem dropping $100-200 bucks to get our hair done, spend thousands of dollars to go on vacations, drive the nicest cars, and wear beautiful clothes. But do we balk at spending a little more for the organic strawberries, organic green juices or for the organic/grass fed meats? This can differ from country to country – Europeans generally spend more on their food than Americans – it is just something that they prioritize.  In my mind, I would rather skip the vacation than eat cheaper food for a year, because it is cheaper to pay the grocer now, instead of paying the doctor later (anyone that has seen a hospital bill lately can attest to this).  Check out this video called The Organic Effect – it is about a family that was not eating organic and the amounts of pesticides that were in their system, and how just 2 weeks of eating organic impacted the amounts of pesticides in their systems!  When we invest in something – we make a commitment to it.  Other ways to invest in your health include – joining a gym, hiring a trainer or a Nutritionist. Some more economical options are to buy an exercise video, a healthy cookbook or nutrition book, or to participate in an online program or a group cleanse.
  3. Screen Shot 2015-05-07 at 4.29.25 PMLearn to say “no.”  This is a big one for people pleasers, and something that I have been working on for years. Although I have come a long way, I still struggle with it – overcommitting and saying “yes” when I should really say “no.” But I keep reminding myself that when I say “yes” to everything – I spread myself too thin, and then I don’t do any one thing really well.  Just remember – if someone asks you to do something, it is okay to say “no.”  It sounds so obvious – but for people pleasers – it is not easy!  Instead of saying “no” right away, you can say “let me check my schedule and I will get back to you.”  People appreciate it when you don’t commit to something that you don’t have the time or energy to put in your best effort on.  Find out if the deadline is flexible, because perhaps you could take it on – at a later time. If your boss is piling on more work – ask “which of my other projects can take a back seat to this one?”   Just note – if you have been someone that says yes to everything, it will take some time to adjust. But learning to say no and paring down, can be life-changing, and perhaps even life-saving because it reduces our stress and allows us more time for ourselves (and our health). My friend Chassie Bell of Chassie Bell Design and I were chatting about this recently, and she recommended the book Essentialism-The Disciplined Pursuit of Less, which is all about getting more done in less time, by focusing on what is really important. I ordered it, and am excited to get more focused and effective.
  4. TAKE time for ‘soul food.’ I am not talking about the black beans and rice kind of soul food. I mean taking time to incorporate joy into your life. Soul food is something that you do just because you enjoy it, not because you should. Maybe it is reading, or writing, taking yoga class or going for walks.  Maybe it is spending time with family or friends.  Take a moment to write down 3 things that you like to do – that brings joy to your life. The thing is, if you are a people pleaser, or a Yes person – you might not even know what your soul food is anymore!!  So take some time, figure out a variety of things that bring joy into your life – and try to make sure you are making time for it regularly.
  5. Stop Chasing Bad Info. Get the goods that actually works. One of the biggest issues today with our health is that there is really a lot of bad information outbook-blog-image there. It is no wonder so many of us are frustrated with our weight and our health!!  We can’t get good results from bad information!  Trying to lose weight and get healthy by counting calories and cutting fat – is not going to get you results – in fact, it could be making your metabolism worse!!  Have you been eating less and exercising more, and frustrated with the excess weight in your midsection?  Have you been trying to eat healthy, and have no idea why your blood sugar is elevated?  I understand – I have been there too.  The real secret to reaching a healthy weight and lowering our disease risk is to heal the metabolism.  That is why I wrote The Perfect Metabolism Plan – to give you the good information that really works – to finally get your health and weight in balance.  It is not a diet book.  It outlines the 10 keys needed to reboot your metabolism – which is the real secret to reaching a healthy weight and achieving vibrant health.   From fixing your blood sugar issues to reducing stress and getting hydrated – The Perfect Metabolism Plan is so much more than a diet book – it is a book that can change your health.

Prioritizing your health doesn’t mean that you still can’t be a doer, a giver, or an overachiever – it just means that you need to remember to save some time and energy for yourself – so you don’t end up in the midst of a health crisis.  When we prioritize our responsibilities, and invest in our health, we take better care of ourselves, and we can be more effective in all areas of our lives.


Sara Vance Article written by Nutritionist Sara Vance, author of the book
The Perfect Metabolism Plan A regular guest on Fox 5 San Diego, you can see many of Sara’s segments on her media page. She also offers corporate nutrition, school programs, consultations, and affordable online eCourses. Download her free 40+ page Metabolism Jumpstart eBook here.

*This article is for educational purposes only. The content contained in this article is not to be construed as providing medical advice. All information provided is general and not specific to individuals. Persons with questions about the above content as how it relates to them, should contact their medical professional. Persons already taking prescription medications should consult a doctor before making any changes to their supplements or medications.

©2015, all rights reserved. Sara Vance.

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